CHANNEL SURFING

Had the luxury of digital TV last night after getting my grandchildren to bed. Thought I’d settle in for an evening’s viewing I’m usually denied as my own idiot box is still the 4 channel variety, but what did I discover? I had about three times the choice, and I went back and forth several times, but there was still nothing worth watching. Surprise surprise! With just over a year to go until the government demands I drag myself out of my antiquated system, I think I’ll wait until then for the privilege of having the choice of more crap to watch than I already have.

Instead, of late I’ve been working through the BBC series From Lark Rise to Candleford, which still hasn’t arrived on Australian screens. An absolutely delightful portrayal of English rural life in the mid 1800s as these working class and middle class communities come to terms with the inroads of progress on their rhythms of life just outside of Oxford. Character development, script and direction are so well done, the Poms have such a good track record in this genre.

Oh well, until the ABC screens the next series of Downton Abbey, 4^th series of Lark Rise here I come.

LOST IN TRANSLATION

It’s a rare occasion that finds me perched in front of the idiot box before 5 o’clock in the morning, but since I’d been awake since 2am and my innards were telling me it had been a long time since dinner, figured I might as well get up and obey.

Armed with a piece of toast and lemon and ginger herbal tea, turned on the telly only to be greeted with the choice of a never ending Zumba infomercial on one channel (who coined that annoying word?), a never ending handyman tools infomercial on another, Rage, and the SBS worldwide weather report. Without the luxury of digital TV my choices are limited, so stuck around until 5am when what was on offer broadened to Power Rangers, more Rage, an American charismatic preacher at full volume, and the Polish News broadcast.

Hmm, what to choose? Opted for the Polish News, which at first I thought might have been Russian News seeing as I’m not exactly a linguist and hadn’t looked at the TV guide, until the cameras focused on a hospital in Warsaw following a motorcycle crash, so at least I knew what country we were in.

I’m not averse to watching an SBS movie with subtitles, but watching the news in a foreign language without subtitles is quite strange. Knowing what’s going on is obviously out of the question, watching what I assume are politicians strutting about doing the sort of thing politicians do the world over, sports reports featuring local heroes I’ve never seen before, redevelopment of places I’ve never heard of, human interest stories, your usual news broadcast fare. Making up my own commentary, trying to piece the stories together from what little clues I could pick up was an interesting exercise. Finally dragged myself back to bed for another couple of hours sleep.

I have a great poster on the wall next to my desk at work.

I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but, I am not sure you realise that what you heard is not what I meant.

Not a bad excuse for those times when maybe my level of communication isn’t that clear. We don’t have to be watching the news in a foreign language to misunderstand what’s going on. Without any trouble at all we can hear without listening, look without seeing, speak without conveying what we mean. It’s one thing to deal with the nuts and bolts of what may be taking place in any given moment, in a conversation, argument, discussion, or whatever, but to recognize the underlying process that is taking place at the same time can be a whole other kettle of fish.

We see the world through our own filters, and they colour how we receive data and process it. Reading the signals as well as taking in the information can tell us whether or not we are accepted, trusted, respected, disliked, being manipulated or a myriad other things. Many a misunderstanding has been based on our perception of the intention of the other person, rather than their actual intention, so listening, really listening, and reading the signals correctly, that’s the challenge.

LEARNING TO LIVE...WITH MORRIE & BOB

Watched Tuesdays with Morrie on the weekend, the movie based on Mitch Albom’s book of the same name, recalling his weekly visits with his old university professor. Hearing that Morrie Schwartz is terminally ill, Mitch rediscovers the affection he had for the professor he dubbed ‘coach’, and in the last months of Morrie’s life finds he learns far more from him than what he gleaned from his sociology lectures and tutorials back in his uni days.

As Morrie’s physical condition deteriorates, he uses the only thing left he can control which has any strength, his voice, to help Mitch see that learning to die teaches us much about learning to live. Sharing his insights on marriage, love, fear, forgiveness, spirituality, intimacy, you name it they talked about it, and in the process Mitch takes his own inward journey to reflect on his own life and the direction in which he’s heading.

Morrie has become an inspiration to many through the gift of Mitch Albom’s book. Morrie certainly had his moments when he raged at his plight and mourned the loss of the life he enjoyed so much, but to quote him…

Dying is only one thing to be sad over. Living unhappily is something else.

Aging is not just decay…it’s growth…If you’ve found meaning in your life, you don’t want to go back, you want to go forward.

The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.

Shed a few tears, great performances by Jack Lemmon and Hank Azaria, as the portrayal of the relationship rekindled between the two men was reminiscent of my own husband’s illness and what he felt as he prepared to die.

Bob lectured in theology, sociology and psychology, as well as being a graphic designer, so his work life was pretty full on. It took a brain tumour to turn our lives upside down in the space of twenty four hours, but like Morrie, the experience brought into focus for him what was important, and while he was still able he also used his voice to share what he was learning about living in the process of dying.

It’s strange to actually face dying…I’m not finished, I’m still learning and growing, and I know God has some lessons for me for this time. You just see things a little clearer or something.

I hope I’ve become a gentler person already. Always was a bit of a workaholic. No computers now, what are they for? I prefer people now.

Don’t want to be a burden – want to be a source of strength, a spring whose waters never fail. I know joy unbounded, I feel surrounded by the goodwill of others.

As busy as his life was the wishes during his illness and tributes after his death reflected that even in the midst of his daily schedule people felt seen, valued, heard, and encouraged to become who they were meant to be. As important as our jobs and careers may be, and whether or not we derive pleasure from them, when it comes down to it, it’s our relationships which are really precious and of lasting value. Giving of ourselves to others is the best investment we can make.

The desire to experience the world fully for Morrie meant having an open heart, and I have no doubt Bob would share Morrie’s evaluation of how to find meaning and purpose…

Have you found someone to share your heart with?

Are you giving to your community?

Are you at peace with yourself?

Are you trying to be as human as you can be?